I’d like to coin a term…

BOWM – Bitter Old White Man

I’m a Bitter Old White Man.  Well, I’m not really old, but I’m bitter, white, and last time I checked, I’m still a man.  I’m in my mid-30s, and may actually be part of the last generation that had it “tough”.  I think I missed the boat by about 10 years.  Today’s “kids” don’t know how great they have it.  Let’s compare how things were back in the not quite dark ages when I was in college, and what the happy-go-lucky student has today. 

I'm the younger one...

Back when I was in college, the only people that had cell phones were rich foreigners.  Laptops were prohibitively expensive.  And if you had one, you were just trying to show off.  The internet was in its infancy, and all we had was dial-up e-mail and news groups.  I was cool in my dorm, or so I thought, because I had a cordless phone, which meant you could walk down the hall and have a conversation.  Today, you not only have high speed internet, but it’s literally everywhere, even on your cell phone.

10 years ago, you had your home phone, and you got a long distance plan.  10 cents a minute was considered good.  Now, it’s all included in your cell phone plan.  With e-mail, how many different addresses have I had between different internet providers and jobs?  Now, with social networking, the e-mail address isn’t the defining category, but the person is the defining category.

Back then, the chicks were into grunge, and wore flannel.  Loose, oversized flannel.  And overalls.  And combat boots.  Today, it’s all tight-fitting, low cut shirts, short shorts, high heels.  And they’re easy to find, since they have the internet on their cell phones.

I currently drive a station car.  Not a station wagon, a station car.  A junker you drive to and from the train station, and nowhere else.  Why pay hundreds of dollars in car payments when it’s going to sit in a parking lot minutes from home every day?  The radio died, so I replaced it…with one with a cassette deck.  Most of my music (as bad as it is), is on tape.  But since the drive is so short, I don’t even bother to pop the detachable faceplate in.  What’s the point?  I adopted CD’s late.  I LOVED my walkman.  I went through many, because I wore the motors out.  I even wore some tapes out.  Today, I have two large BOXES of cassettes, and two more of CD’s.  Now, you can walk around with an ipod with every song you’ve even owned on it.  Do today’s kids even know what an album is, in the day of 99 cent downloads?

I don’t even want to go off about black-and-white televisions, TV’s without remote controls, and rotary dial telephones.

What? WHAT?

 I’m listening to content on my ipod for about 12 hours a day, be it news (MSNBC), sports/talk (Michael Kay), hot talk (Don Geronimo), or podcasts (SomaCow: the greatest internet talk show ever).  If I’m at work, I have my docking station and speakers set up.  But all other times, I’m plugged into headphones.  I’ve been plugged in on the school bus, now the train.  I mow the lawn, take out the trash, paint the house, and even as I type this out, I’m listening to some kind of content.  And they’ll wear out with use, as I know from my Sony Walkman days.

The first to go are the original ones that come with your Walkman/Discman/ipod.  Let’s face it, you’re buying the music player, not the headphones.  Sony or whoever is doing you a favor by essentially giving you the equivalent of a doughnut.  Not Dunkin, but the small spare tire that you can use to limp to the next gas station.  But if you want performance tires, go get them yourself. 

Over the 20 plus years of slowly destroying my hearing (and not even to good music), I’ve found the original Sony ear buds are a workhorse, last a while, store easily, and are a great value overall at about $10.  Now Sony makes them in white to mimic the original ipod ones.  I prefer black, as it hides the dirt better, but Santa Claus brought my current pair, so who am I to complain?  Let’s face it, I don’t need the current Bose version of the circa 1978 Tattletales headphones for the crap I listen to. 

But the one thing with the white headphones is that they are more visible than the black ones.   Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you see two white wires, and you instantly know what they are.  There is no doubt in your mind.  And somebody is walking down the street with them, either they’re listening to something, or they’re a sociopath.  Or both.  But you’re going to assume they’re on.

So can anybody please explain why people come right up to me and strike up a conversation when I have my headphones on, and they don’t even give me a chance to pull them out, or turn my ipod off?  Tourists, strangers on the train, neighbors…it doesn’t matter.  But I get the dirty look when I ask them to repeat what they said?  I could just ignore you instead…